Self Help Articles

Don’t go back to Sleep!

Driving along a country road I saw to my right a flock of sheep moving towards somewhere or something in a follow the leader fashion. It was a large enough flock moving in unison and fast enough to fascinate me. So I pulled over to watch. On either side of the line were openings that were large enough for escape but none seemed to notice.

The sheep were busy following each other and especially following the one directly in front. They were fitting in not looking left or right and moving as if hypnotized. The sheep were alive and moving with no curiosity about what was outside their line of vision or the possibility of escaping into a more interesting life.

So I wondered how much are we like the sheep?

We stay asleep if we don’t question the rules of living passed down to us by family of origin, schools, churches, work…

Are Your Relationships Rinse and Repeat? Why is That?

Part 2:

Reflect on your Romantic Relationships and deep Friendships.  Is it time to release some of the players on your life stage? You know the ones that no longer fit your life story in terms of who you are or who you are becoming?

What is your Relationship Story? We all have one …a story that is if we look closely. What are the repetitive patterns?  Do you continue to attract certain types of people? You know the ones who seem so loving and attentive in the beginning but before long leave you feeling unloved and unimportant.  Are you thinking;  this person seemed so different, why then am I feeling the same? Different person, similar pattern, same story!

When the same kinds of struggles or issues keep popping up in our lives, it has meaning…

What do You Really Want/Need in a Partner?

Part 1:

As a Marriage and Family Therapist, I’ve had a front row seat, observing ways women sabotage themselves when it comes to having more of what they want/need in intimate relationships.

It may surprise you but often women spend more time planning the details of vacation time, or Christmas dinner than reflecting on what they really want in an intimate relationship…Forget about the picture that we are given by Madison Avenue, or romance novels in the attempt to sell us illusions.

You have more power to choose a solid and loving relationship than you realize…

Will You Betray Another to be Faithful to Yourself?

It is easy to see betrayal when a family member or friend ignores what is in their best interest. You can clearly see when they put their creativity on the back burner, to not make waves, to not threaten a partner or create anxiety in themselves or the family.

Seeing the truth of what others are doing to themselves…that my friends is awareness. Why is it easier to see other’s denial but in ourselves not so much?

We are ill-prepared to witness betrayals of self…

“I just want it back… to the way it was!”

How many times during this crisis have you heard some version of the above? I’ve had clients raw with grief or despair make this statement with every fiber of their being, wanting somehow to get back to the before crisis state. No matter what this statement is about;...

A New Year, a New beginning…Where to start?

I am starting with a new title for my Newsletter. My Passionate Living Newsletter from now on will be titled “Woman to Woman”. Men are welcome of course but over the last few years my passion and focus has been more and more turning to ways I can be of help to women....

Love is all around

“We accept the love we think we deserve”― Stephen Chbosky Do you believe that you are truly lovable? Do you believe that you are deserving of the love you dream about? Do you allow love in? Do you believe there is enough love to go around? Do you believe that there is...

Healing from Loss of Love

Passivity does not help, denial does not heal. "Give sorrow words: The grief that does not speak whispers the oe’r fraught heart, and bids it break." (Shakespeare, 1892) A major loss of love that does not get respected enough in our society is divorce. Some people...

Regrets, I’ve had a few…

Regrets, I’ve had a few But then again, too few to mention It is puzzling to me when somebody says that they have no regrets. None? Is that possible? I know what they mean, of course, but it just doesn’t add up for me.  When I hear someone say that they have no...

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