When times are difficult, do you have some memories to sustain you? To help you know that dark times will not last forever?
It doesn’t matter when you experienced them. They are still part of you… I will show you how to make your memories your allies.
My father died when I was eight and my mother became very ill. Life as I knew it changed forever. I was the oldest of six children. We went to a mainland and put in an Orphanage spending many years there.
The Orphanage run by the Sisters of Mercy. It was like being locked up in hard plaster walls – hunger at times, no outdoor time, the motto was “be seen and not heard”, “stay invisible – you don’t count as a person, you have no power”.
When did your tower tumble down?
How about you? Have you had an overwhelming experience that changed life as you knew it or expected it to be?
If you are not over what happened or feel like there is some part of it still interfering with the quality of your life… I can help.
I married, and was blessed with two daughters – there was a divorce after a 13-year marriage.
I heard, “why would you leave? You’ve never had it so good.” Somehow, as excruciating as it was, I got enough backbone to leave. I did not feel the power. I had to fight feeling paralysis.
(My daughters have grown into strong, resilient, courageous and wise women. They changed as necessary to meet the challenges that life sends without complaint while maintaining a delicious sense of humor. I so admire them.
My amazing grandson taught how to truly love, and not lose touch with what is really important).
Do you realize the multi-levels of loss when you divorce, become widowed or end a significant breakup?
My ex-was correct in that I had more material comforts than ever before. There are, however, worse things than being alone.
I believe that divorce is a sorrow that does not get enough respect in our culture. It is a multi-leveled loss that causes much pain and insecurity.
As a single mom, I spent years working days and going to University at night to beat the odds and become a psychotherapist.
What dream have you struggled to attain?
If you delayed, it is not too late. All your attempts count: nothing is wasted.
There came a time when I needed to face the stored trauma in my being. “This is bigger than me.”
As soon as I could, I went into psychotherapy to work through grief related to losses, rage, and a deep sense of powerlessness. (Not everyone needs Psychotherapy, but I did – I had a lot of work to do. It sped things up for me to live happier.)
Don’t put off seeking guidance.
Healing that is delayed can and must be resolved to create a meaningful and happy life.