Money, it turned out, was exactly like sex, you think of nothing else if you didn’t have it and thought of other things if you did. - James Balwin
Questions Provide Space For Dreams To Take Flight
Self Help Articles
You must do the things you think you cannot do. - Eleanor Roosevelt
Do you want to be 87 on your death bed saying I wish I had risked more back then - it would have made a difference in the quality of my life. Many times when we have a dream, a vision, we don’t know where to start to realize it, we are over-whelmed by the magnitude and the grandeur of it and feel really stuck. However, most of the time when we feel blocked in an area of our life, it is because we feel safer that way. We may not be happy, but at least we know what we are - unhappy - it is familiar and we become paralyzed by any of movement into the unknown.
…”I recall, I really don’t know life at all” Some mornings when I go for my walk its not quire daylight. There is just enough light to see where I’m going in the early morning fog, or rising sun. Although I’m on a familiar path there are times something up ahead looks eerily different and alarming. When I get abreast of what looked like a crouching ferral animal, I see it is no more than an old rotting tree stump, changing shapes in the semi darkness. I relax and continue on the path. Something rustles fiercely in the woods. I’m sure it’s a bobcat and once again I’m relieved that it is just a rabbit or a herd of deer—running away from me.
“Creative energy that is not being rightly used...” (Osho, 1999)
A Master lived in the mountains. He answered several of life’s hard questions for the inquirer without hesitation. When asked how to handle anger, he broke his walking stick in half and bellowed, “Do you think I’d be living alone in this deserted place if I had the answer to that?” Sooner or later we all have to come down from the mountain, and deal with fellow humans in the market place. Someone is invariably going to step on our toe, OUCH!!
Since change is the only constant in our lives, why is it so frightening to choose to change? Often it is thrust upon us and we didn’t see it coming. It may come in a way that cuts us off at the knees, such as having life, as we know it obliterated, like a tornado or hurricane. Somehow when such happens, time and time again we observe people having the courage and determination to reach down into their reservoir of resilience to deal with catastrophe. Where did all their courage, fearlessness, faith, determination come from, we ask ourselves. How were they able to do it? For most of us it takes a crisis, a howling hurt, to send us into that deep well of greater capacity.
I once heard George Carlin the comedian address the topic of vacations, and how people handle their “stuff.” People usually take a smaller version of their stuff on vacation and sequentially smaller versions to their hotel room, or to the beach etc. He was hysterical; resonating with the need we have for the familiar in order to feel more comfortable. Reflecting on this I wondered if it is the same with our stress level? Do we take a smaller version of our stress with us on vacation? Are we such creatures of habit that we unconsciously take along some stress to stay in our comfort zone?
When we list our desires, wants and life goals, we often omit “failure”. We must fail if we are to risk living passionate lives. We live in a culture that has become soft, in that it conditions us to seek comfort and avoid discomfort. There is a lack of appreciation for the wisdom that hardship bestows. There is an illusion that it is possible to live in a world where things come easily and failure can be avoided, and if your life is not “this ideal,” there is something is wrong with you. We will naturally take the path of least resistance, clinging to the familiar, staying within our restricted safe places in an attempt to control the outcome.
Many of us, at a deep level, are afraid of success. On surface, we declare that we are going for the gold, the Ph.D., own a business…be the best! That which actually manifests in our life may be something entirely different. What is certain is that our core beliefs will express in our life regardless of what we say. When there is conflict between conscious wants and unconscious beliefs guess what manifests. The unconscious has the most powerful influence on the level of success evident in our lives.
"Everyone is a moon and has a dark side which he never shows to anybody." Twain
(The following is an excerpt from my latest book - "Journey into a Passionate Life." There is a companion workbook for those who want the tools and guidance to delve deeper into that part of self that they try desperately to hide.. The complete chapter may be read on my website LifeResourceCenter.net)
“Every one is a moon, and has a dark side which he never shows to anybody.” (Twain, 1897)
Be patient toward all that is unsolved in your heart and try to love the questions themselves. Rainer Maria Rilke
In “The Road Less Travelled”, Scott Peck says the God of our youth is a second hand one. Just like family recipes, passed down and nobody questions the validity of the ingredients, we do not change them to breathe new flavor into the food. Same with God. Peck adds it is imperative we search and create an up close and personal relationship with God that evolves with us throughout our lives. If we are to grow into wise adults, it is necessary for our idea of God to grow with us.